The vagina can become savage pretty quickly.Â
It can throw tantrums (think discharges)... give you a sour face (strong odors)... or even make your life pretty uncomfortable by itching you to death :)Â
But the vagina never acts up if you listen to her screams when things start going off. (You listen to your vagina by checking your pH everyday with a good vagina pH testing kit.)
Yes, the vagina will ALWAYS try to get your attention.Â
And if you donât listen, she will get mad and make your life a little living hell (sheâs got all the power you know:))
So today, weâre going to talk about how to keep your vagina happy so that she will give you all the love you deserve.đđ
Letâs get started!
#1. âPlease let me breatheâÂ
Oh, she so hates this one.
Everyone does.Â
DONâT try to suffocate your vagina by wearing tight clothing (especially undies that donât let her breathe).Â
By tight undies, we mean undies that are made with synthetic fabrics that let no air through.
Undies that are so tight she canât get any air.Â
She hates those. And one of her best punishments to those that try to suffocate her is to make a sour face (release a stronger odor)⌠especially when you want to do-the-deed đ
So hereâs the lesson: switch to cotton undies if you havenât and sheâll thank you for it.
If you havenât enjoyed the freedom that is sleeping without undies, you gotta try it. Itâs a habit thatâll do you and your vagina a lot of good!
#2. âYogurtttttđâ
Your vagina will probably act up when you eat certain foods.Â
Certain foods like onions, garlic, fish (donât scream), etc. will alter your odor slightly afterwards.Â
Ladies have reported smelling like onions after eating onionsâŚÂ
Smelling like garlic after consuming some⌠andâŚ
Smelling fishy after eating some fish.Â
While itâs not a hard and fast rule, what you eat generally affects your vaginal health.Â
Certain foods are VERY GOOD for vaginal health especially plain yogurt.Â
Yogurt is a natural probiotic. The more yogurt you eat, the better your vaginal health will get over time.Â
Why? Yogurt contains tons of good bacteria thatâs beneficial to a female body, especially the vagina.Â
This leads us perfectly into the next one:
#3. âI can clean myself, you knowđâÂ
The vagina is a self-cleaning organ.Â
If you donât know how it works yet, here is a simple explanation.Â
Thereâs a war going on in every vagina in the world.Â
War between the good and bad bacteria.
When your good bacteria is in charge, the bad guys are kept at bay and you canât get an infection.Â
But the problem arises when the number of your vaginaâs good bacteria begin to go down.Â
As in all wars, the side with more fighters is gonna win.Â
So when the number of good bacteria in your vagina begins to fall, the bad guys start to gain control. This is how a vaginal infection usually starts.Â
So, in a nutshell, when your vagina has enough good bacteria, itâs almost impossible to get an infection.Â
This is why it can be helpful to supplement your vaginaâs good bacteria.Â
You can do that in two ways:Â
- By taking probiotics orÂ
- By making it easier for your good bacteria to grow (by keeping your pH acidic. This is why itâs good advice to use a boric acid suppository every once in a while).Â
Even though the vagina self-cleans, some ladies (trying to make her smell like flowers and taste sweet) make a very terrible mistake that she hates.Â
#4 âEver seen anyone that HATES to smell good? Meet me!đđ¤Şđ¤đâ
The vagina wants to keep her ânormalâ odor so much that if you try to change her scent, sheâll get really pissed.Â
On the other hand⌠some ladies would really like to make their vaginas smell like flowers⌠because⌠itâll give them a huge confidence boost (especially when itâs time to get naughty).Â
Itâs only so bad that the vagina (that they want to soup up so badly) hates that.
Why, though?Â
Because fragrances mess up the queenâs ability to clean things up.Â
They contain tons of chemicals that interfere (or even sometimes kill) your good bacteria. So using fragrances is a narrow road to a glorious vaginal infection.Â
Want to make her super happy? Avoid scented soaps/fragrances totally.
#5 âOh no! What did you just do to me?â
Some ladies think that when their vagina is acting up (especially with a fishy odor or infection)... that they can just wash it inside out with a douche.Â
But⌠if you donât know it yetâŚ
Douching will usually produce the exact opposite result you want because⌠(you guessed it)... the queen hates it!
Hereâs what happens when you douche:Â
The liquid will wash out ALL the bacteria in your vagina.Â
Before you think thatâs good news⌠remember that if you have an infection, your good bacteria population is already very low.
So when you douche, you wash away ALL thatâs left.Â
And since itâs well known that bad buys are generally tougher than good guysâŚÂ
The bad bacteria will make a quicker comeback⌠and things may get a lot worse.
Summary: Donât douche.
 #6 âShe gets high tooâ
Yup, the vagina can get high too!Â
Just kidding.Â
The bad bacteria in the vagina gets fired up if you smoke or drink lots of alcohol.Â
So if youâre struggling with vaginal issues, it may be a good idea to cut down or limit your alcohol and caffeine intake for a while. So that youâre not indirectly fueling the fire youâre trying to put out.Â
Click here to read more about how smoking affects vagina health
And finallyâŚÂ
#7 âWhy donât you ever ask how Iâm doing?đ˘đżâ
The vagina loves attention (as much as you dođ)...
And if you donât give it to her, sheâs not gonna like it very much.Â
Best to pay attention before things get worse.
Most women do not even know their vagina is talking to them⌠until sheâs screaming at them with discharges and strong odors.Â
How do you know what message your vagina is trying to pass across?Â
- By checking your pH at least once a week! (And if you want to be extra careful once a day)
Itâs so crucial because if youâre about to develop an infection, your pH will start to go all over the place.Â
And if you arenât checking if regularly (if youâre not listening to your vagina)... then youâll never know⌠until itâs a full-blown infection.Â
So, get some good vagina pH testing kits (not just any pH testing kit. It must be vagina-grade)...
And use them often.Â
Combine that habit with the ones discussed in this article and you have a rock-solid vaginal microbiome thatâll easily handle anything thatâs thrown at it... like a queen!